j

Notes from Wednesday I am too lazy to properly type. A story in sentence fragments.

j standing in the parking lot, my stupid question was "which car is yours?" lessee:
infinitis and bmws for partners
pontiacs and corvettes for playboys
bmv suv for sophisticated midlevel assoc
priuses, corollas for the rest
gray bike w reflective stickers for lesbifrump
then one fifteen year old station wagon spilling over with crap, lefty bumper stickers up to rear window, bike rack but no apparent bike, burned things inside, wicker basket with espresso boiler, paper bags
on dash, sage brush burnt on one end "with car lighter, or my other means of starting fires"
tree air freshener stuck somewhere in the car when she bought it 2d hand, couldn't find it, maybe between cushions, tried to mask with burnt sage
remember: her sleeping in car from SF to telluride - what 19 year old girl sleeps on the side of the highway?; her driving us to arches national park at 75 mph in dying red hatchback with no seatbelts; subway sandwiches on the way to santa fe; "listen to your heart" my favorite song then
relationship of coloradans to cars
grow up driving the only way out of box canyon
live here four years but get lost on the one major road in PA
why was she wearing winter clothes
"wanderlust" tattoo
on afternoon of same day, a break from work to walk to swimming pool on stanford with memories: 1) strange autumn light on summer day, not terribly hot, 2) MB at midnight, 1998, 3) nc-17 underwater motions with m.; fences remodeled, easier to climb; now not willing to disobey the law, a terrible reason to be disbarred; wondering whether j would be interested in a swim
j immediately launched into story about pele, hawaiian goddess she said was out to get her
the goddess of small irritations
rental car accident, bad travel companion, ear infection, car break-in
there are ghosts in the mountains
things stolen out of car: thift store shirts, ancient camping gear, pee funnel
also goddess of genuine tragedy
swine flu death of her supervisor who moved to alaska to make money (why go to alaska to make money?)
saturn returns (again)
her anger at ex-bf not wanting to be around, his idea of "contractual obligation"
too much happening at checkout (balloons, chinless man in bike helmet) to have proper conversation
chocolate stout beer in coffee cups
sandwiches, andes mints, pickles
walk to park on birch street
total darkness except windows of occasional night train on tracks 100' away
eating sandwiches in dark
boys on bikes making retching noises
opposite paths - me only money, no time; her only time, no money
no hurry to get back to moab except she has no money left
camping bf (?)
love languages test
i didn't say much until 8:30, then "i need to go back to work, shut up and eat your sandwich and i'm going to talk about myself and you just listen"
me admitting a nadir in last four months
small pleasures - walks, trees, quiet, sunshine, listening to albums in entirety, space, boo hopping with joy at my return, dad's nonsense commentary
fear of new york
her challenge to pele was 15 mile hike alone without food ("i had a cracker with peanut butter in the car") and minimal water at 13,000ft on dormant volcano, which i called "stupid" and "idiotic." j said i was only the second person with that reaction, most others were admiring, i said again it was stupid and she could have died
time slows when with j
enough history here that when time passes it's not tedious to catch up

[I wrote "dogs who love each other..........................." in margin of the post-it but I think this was empty doodling not related to J.]