bao

It's for you, stupid.

my heart

is leaping like a deer with its hooves caught in nests of bees!
is filled like a rooftop water tower on stilts!
is as engorged as Ithaca!
is leaking with love like the Holy Ghost!
is taking over my body!
is durable when fileted!
is grapeshot in the sky!
is tattooed on my heart!
is a four-minute mile!
is a palm frond! a tiny dancer! a bus!
is a hundred hot air balloons filled with hearts!
is a happy black and white dog slipping on grass!
hangs in my throat!
spins in my wheels!
walks on my feet!
toils!
howls!
is yours! is yours! is yours!
Take it!


I am at the moment alternating between manic states and have found a high one during which to blog. I feel like a waterfall of love. I feel like I should distribute ponchos for the mist. Maybe it's the smell of wet chaparral at the turn from Stanford Avenue onto Escondido Road, or the long days of light, or a feeling of terror plus disbelief, or a great unfulfilled promise, or Molly Malone in my ears. I don't know. I'm an optimist. There is so much love in the atmosphere - up, in the air! It's like a mimosa tree and we are giraffes and all we have to do is lift our ten-foot long necks up and eat the twigs and we'll have it! I know I sound like I'm on drugs but this is how I feel.

Also, no more blogging ever again about anything of substance. (Like that was ever a threat?) I want you all to know that this is who I would prefer to be, devoid of politics, ambition, and opinions, that I am primarily interested in stories and feelings, and that all of the Myers-Briggs type indicator tests I have taken have been wrong and I am, in the end, not a monster but an ENFP. Good night!

palindrome

Studying alone for standardized test in cold library, starting law school, fucking up, clinic, summer, clinic, fucking up, ending law school, studying alone for standardized test in cold library.

Three years. I've come a long way, baby.

young man hard man

goodbye

Goodbye, I'm leaving, goodbye forever. I'll be on hiatus until the grieving ends. Cockles and mussels, alive, alive-o!

graduation

I graduated. NYU managed to mispronounce a two-letter last name and call me [Bananarchist] Ho. We were corralled in a humid hallway for an hour by a woman with a bullhorn (and a bolt gun?) telling us that once we began "processing" we would not be permitted to use the bathroom. My friend Cynthia asked why our seats didn't come with air sickness bags for the portion of the festivities that included a bombastic, self-celebrating speech by Anne Milgram, J.D. 1996, AG of New Jersey. Reena bent over a gossip magazine with a pen in hand and read an article entitled "Does Mischa Barton have CELLULITE?" intently while ignoring the procession of five million "Allez!"-hollering L.L.M.s. Sonia began or completed five rounds of telephone pictionary. Four hours later, I returned my Cap'n Gown. Arggh, matey! And then we ate cheese on sticks and drank white wine spritzers and that was the end of my life as a law student. Now what's my identity??

russian ark

You can procrastinate by watching this thrilling music video:

I am learning to sing "Lili Marlene" in German instead of writing the last two memos that stand between me and a J.D. It is a Nazi song, or just a song appropriated by the Nazis? Leni Riefenstahl or the Baron Von Munchhausen? I am also learning some Irish folk songs.

Notes from Art Law, January 31, 2008

"The class takes turns making noises. Caw, caw! Gobble, gobble, gobble. Mewl, meow, mao. Rrruf, rrr, rrrruf! Moo. AA thinks Sally Mann’s photos could easily be prosecuted as CP under Dost since there is no serious LAPS value defense available in CP law."

I am awesome at law school.

cleats

OMFG I am taking my Art Law takehome exam right now and the children downstairs have chosen today as the day they will blast shitty house music all night long! They haven't blasted music since the last time I went pounding on their door, about a month ago - then they choose tonight! AAGGH!!! Please buy me rugby cleats so I can tap dance above their beds tomorrow night!!!!

P.S. The answers for the takehome are (1) A; (2) B; and (3) C. Shhh!

no news

Everyone is quirky in their Facebook profiles! I know because I looked at everybody's profiles. Besides that, no updates. All I did today was watch three episodes of the Simpsons, salivate over this, read about the misinterpretation of Lynyrd Skynyrd lyrics, eat, eat again, and walk Boo twice. Now it is time to eat again.

cloves

I bought a 20-pack of clove cigarettes in 2004. I still have the pack. I smoke about 3 per finals period. I just smoked one. I was temporarily dizzy, but now I just feel ill. I think I might finish the pack during this finals period. I am already getting sentimental for this feeling of nausea.

a plea

Those of you with blogs, please blog more. I am trying not to study for Art Law.

Those of you without blogs, please start a blog. I am trying not to study blah blah blah.

Thank you.

poppies

You are NOT a fatso. You know who I'm talking about. Yes, you. You are not. So stop stressin'.

anthony's song

Now that I have nothing left to prematurely sell, I am prematurely packing. I started by packing up my journals. I have been so prolific! I filled an entire box with notepads covered in scratchings and sophomoric doodles. I also found some things I thought I had lost:

The 2002 Telephone Pictionary game that started it all. The last line is the work of the beautiful mind of T. Mok, whom I've known since she threw her SAT vocab cards (and later a box of tampons) at me in Yasuda Sensei's seventh grade Japanese class.

A 2002 letter from my dad, which he left on top of my desk one day. If you can't read it, it says: "Mandy: Forgive again: I have to remind you that don't never try to take a picture with Xerox machine. It has UV - (ultraviolet) light built in. If you watch close by you will temporary loose your vision. But if you stare it while it whipes through, as close as in inches, you will loose your vision permanently. love DAD." This letter is even awesomer because nothing I was doing that day, or in previous days, suggested I had even contemplated staring at a Xerox while it wiped.

Still haven't read any Art Law!